Snímek 1 - Valka.cz

Snímek 1 - Valka.cz

Valask vnoce . . . Mamo, pt sa o edrm du u stromeka ogrek: To to vecko n nadlil Jeek ?? No bae, Jeek, kdo in ??

Aha, take Vy s tat ste sa na ma vysrali aj letos - e ....?! Sed hajn na posedu a ek na srnce. Najednou vid,jak tyi cikni nesou krmelec.

Hajzlov jedni, co nen pibit nebo pivaen, to ukradnou, muml si pod vousy. Pak celej rozzuenej nam flintu a BC, BC,.... a dva cikni spadnou mrtv na zem. Z krmelce vyleze skin a povid :Do prdele

prce, nov auto a hned dv gumy v hajzlu. Blondnka jede autem a zastav ji policajt: V idik prosm. Blondnka na nj chvli nechpav kouk. Je to takov

kartika a je na n Vae fotka, sna se pomoci policajt. Ona se zane pehrabovat v kabelce, po chvli vynd zrctko a pod ho pslunkovi. Ten se na nj podv, vrac ho zptky a prav: To jste mla ct

hned, e jste policajtka, jete. Potkaj se dva kamardi: Jak se Ti vede? Ale, budu se rozvdt.A pro, prosm t? Ale, rno u sndan jsem se peekl..

??? Chtl jsem ct ,milku, mohla bys mi, prosm T, uvait kvu a msto toho jsem ekl.Ty krvo star, posrala jsi mi cel ivot.

ernoch s papoukem na rameni vejde do obchodu a prodavaka prav: Je krsn, odkud ho mte? Z Afriky, tam je jich plno.Odpov papouek.

Co maj _eny na prsou: 1. ve 20 letech sperma, 2. ve 40 letech zlato 3. v 60 letech gumu od teplk..

Rozdlen mu dle hudebnch nstroj: 1. do 20 let Fltnista vythne a hned hraje 2. 20 35 let Houslista 5 minut lad a pak hodinu hraje

3. 35 45 let Klarinetista hodinu lad a pak vrzne 4. 45 55 let Basista 2x zabru a je konec 5. 55 65 let Ladi jenom lad a hraje za nj nkdo jin

6. 65 a ve Kapelnk nelad, nehraje, zato asto ukazuje. eny se dl na: 1. Vclavky: do 20 let dr se koen

2. Bleky: 20 30 let skou z postele do postele 3. Tesilky: 30 40 let jsou k neroztrhn 4. Sokolky: 40 50 let kdy se svlknou, lovk ekne: "No nazdar!"

5. Cibulky: 50 let a ve m vce se svlkaj, tm vc by lovk breel. Skaut = dt obleen jako kretn, pod vedenm kretna obleenho jako dt

Meteorolog = expert, kter doke pesn vysvtlit, pro se mu verej pedpov nepotvrdila Kamardka = osoba opanho pohlav, kter m nco, co zpsobuje, e se s n nechce vyspat Informatik = odbornk, kter vye problm, kter vbec

neexistoval, zpsobem, ktermu nikdo nerozum Intelektul = lovk, kter doke vce ne dv hodiny myslet na nco jinho, ne na sex Hardware = ta st potae, do kter mete kopnout, kdy pestane fungovat software

Jeden mu ml rd ti eny a nemohl se rozhodnut, se kterou se m oenit. Tak dal kad 50 tisc korun, aby s nimi udlaly, co uznaj za nejlep. Prvn si nakoupila aty, kosmetiku, perky a prav: Udlala jsem, drah,

ve pro to, abys ml tu nejkrsnj enu. Druh nakoupila vci pro nho: obleen, sportovn poteby, npojov soupravy do baru atd. To proto, drah, abys vdl, jak na Tebe myslm .Tet vrhla penze do podnikn a po krtk dob pinesla mui zpt 100

tisc korun. Abys vidl, jak jsem ikovn. I zamyslel se mu a nakonec si vybral tu s nejvtma kozama.

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